These are some top-notch, hybrid friggin’ flip-flops I’m featuring here.

There’s basically two kinds of flip-flops; the simple flat soled ones like the Quiksilver ones on Tuesday or the upmarket shaped soled ones like this pair of Reef ones.

They are as comfortable as trainers, they suck in the fresh air and blow out the stink and these bad boys also have a bottle opener in the sole…have I just sorted your summer out or what.

This pair of Reef Fanning Camo Brown/Tan/Orange Flip Flops are £40 and shipping is FREE. Also, get 5% off! Use the coupon code - SURF05 - at the checkout. Offer ends on 30th June 2008 - so that’s £36 to your front door sir!. BUY

Surfdome - is an online surf store with tshirts, shorts, shoes, flip-flops and more stuff than the tide brings in.

As with good football, keep it simple. These sunglasses from Zegna are the voice of simplicity.

Eyewear should not get complicated otherwise you’ll fall into the trap of looking like an utter douchebag. Subtlety is the name of the game here, unlike these abominations - Pirelli SPZ002.

This pair of Zegna SZ3022M Sunglassess are £100 reduced from £150 and come with FREE next day delivery. BUY

D&A Sunglasses - is a store that sells designer sunglasses, simple innit.

Footwear for summer is important, your feet will sweat so getting air to them is vital.

Wearing trainers with socks looks crap. Wearing trainers without socks is gross. Wearing trainers with those poxy little socks that you try to hide but everyone knows you’re wearing them is just pointless.

Get some air with flip-flops. They are versatile; you can wear them with shorts or with jeans/trousers. They are also pretty cheap too.

Forget about the Jesus-Creeper sandals. They aren’t cool or hippyish or whatever, they are shit. Pure and simple.

This pair of Quiksilver flip-flops are also available in black and in black/brown.

This pair of Quiksilver Tan Abyss Flip-Flops are £14 and shipping is £4. If you spend £70 or more then shipping is FREE…and I should bloody hope so too! BUY

Board Sport Warehouse - an online surf store with tons of shorts, boardies, tshirts, flip-slops, sunglasses and other stuff to keep you as cool as a cucumber packed in ice.

The summer’s here…touch wood…so first things first, protect your eyes and look the dog’s bollocks with a pair of sunglasses.

Be careful, sunglasses can be a treacherous area where you can get it badly wrong and look like a complete tool.

Too much extravagant eye furniture can deem you a total knobface. For an example, check these monstrosities out - Police S8007S - they’ll make your eyes want to abort themselves.

This pair of Rayban’s are suitably restrained in brown to keep your eyes and face cool without going overboard on the dick factor.

This pair of sweet Rayban RB4075 Sunglasses are £80 with FREE next day delivery. BUY

D&A Sunglasses - is a store that sells designer sunglasses, simple innit.

This is a good looking tennis trainer with a mesh upper so it’s light and airy for your stinking feet.

Also available in green/white and black/white in sizes from 6 to 11.

A pair of Adidas Originals CG Tour trainers are £50 and shipping is £5. BUY

JD Sports your local high street sports store also has this website flogging all the same stuff and more without the hassle of actually leaving your house.

The nice weather is approaching, you can’t wear jeans or trousers all day so this is where we get to the tricky subject of shorts.

It really is best to keep it simple if you haven’t got tanned footballer legs. If you’re currently sporting spindly little pins like cotton wool ear buds then at least have the decency to wear a tame pair of shorts so as to divert attention away from your lower half.

This pair of plain white, unfussy shorts are just the trick. Long enough to cover up the top half of your Tippex coated limbs, stylish enough to look alright and plain enough to not encourage pointing.

Over 30’s also have to be wary of not dressing their age in a pair of luminous surf shorts with patterns that would make a sailor sick, act your age not your mortgage’s interest rate.

The biggest ’short crime’ of all, as we all know, is a pair of undersized, tight Phil Mitchell cut-off denims. But I don’t need to tell you that do I.

This pair of Sol Cal Linen Shorts are £20 and shipping is £4. BUY

Republic really nice store with many urban brands such as Bench, Crafted, G-Star, Drunknmunky and more.

www.redsquareclothing.co.uk - is a men’s clothing shop in Middlesborough that’s being going for a quite a few years.

They sent an email asking for some linkage so here it is, along with a little review as not enough independent shops contact us. They got an ecommerce site too so the rest of us non-Middlesboroughonians can get ourselves some of the action.

They got loads of designer labels, mainly the urban type (is that the right term? It sounds a bit wanky doesn’t it.) like Carhatt, Artful Dodger, One Tue Saxon plus some of the 80 retro styles that always get some loving on here; Lacoste and Sergio Tacchini.

Loads of items, easy to use shopping cart, items list stock availability which is always a nice touch, good prices and if you spend over £50 shipping is FREE and next day. Can’t say fairer than that can you?

www.redsquareclothing.co.uk - so there’s the link, get yourself down there and have a browse, that report for Kevin in Accounting can wait until tomorrow. Kevin’s a twat anyway.

If there are any other independent clothing stores that want to get some SmartGeezer attention, then just contact us, bribery is highly encouraged.

Summer’s arriving soon…hopefully, so get yourself stocked up with some short sleeved shirts so you can remain smart without being overheated.

This simple, understated white/brown short sleeved shirt by Ben Sherman is something that can acheive ‘coolness’ in more ways than one.

Ben Sherman have a load of casual shirts both long and short sleeved that you should check out.

This Ben Sherman White/Brown short sleeved checked shirt is £35. Shipping is £3.50. BUY

Ben Sherman - the official Ben Sherman online store has a few short sleeved shirts, a few long sleeved ones and other stuff from the British epitome of cool.

The classic Adidas Superstar is wheeled out for another cashing in outing…which is a result.

This pair have the option of changing the three stripes on the side. There is a little plastic thingy that slips in and out and is available in different colours so you can look as though you’ve got loads of different trainers.

A pair of Adidas Originals Superstar II TL trainers are £55 and shipping is £5. BUY

JD Sports your local high street sports store also has this website flogging all the same stuff and more without the hassle of actually leaving your house.

Summer’s here so everyone knows you need to make sure you have a jacket at the ready. Now is a good time as jackets are getting reduced left, right and centre as retailers deceive themselves that selling shorts and tshirts is the main priority to keep up the illusion that this summer might just be OK.

Their delusion is our advantage, geezers.

If yesterday’s Quiksilver jacket didn’t quite do it for you then this Dunderdon jacket might just be your cup of tea.

This Dunderdon Men’s S18 Softshell Jacket is now £55 reduced from £95. Shipping is £3.50. BUY

Big Bad Buffalo is an online store with urban and skate style brands such as Fenchurch, Fly53, Dunderdon, Supremebeing and others. Stocks stuff you won’t find in most other places so well worth checking out.